Thursday, November 29, 2007

Hooked on a Feeling

Can't explain this feeling in any way other than to say it is just my gut...I think baby girl will be born Nov. 30th. This was grandma m's birthday, and I can just imagine her tucked in up there in heaven, watching her great granddaughter come into the world. For those that knew grandma, you know what I mean when I say I just have that sense. (Got that from grandma :) ) Whether she is about to be born, is already in this world, or is on her way, I continue to pray that God protects her, and that God surrounds her mother with strength and healing as she faces circumstances I cannot imagine. God, protect them both....

On to the truly mundane....the list continues to move. However, I am bracing myself for a March or April referral at the earliest with travel in the summer. There are many families ahead of us. I am hoping to not travel the one week we have set aside for a family vacation in June...but I will go whenever that call comes!! I know that God has the timing all figured out and in all honesty, at this point, I am okay to wait...there are lots of things brewing and I am sure the timing will be just right. I know she will come.

Everyone here is battling the resp crud. The nights and early mornings are a symphony of deep frog coughs and sniffle-y noses. Rumor has it this one lasts about a month. :(. The first big snow of the season is being predicted for the weekend. I am ready...I think I have found all the jackets and mittens! We were rehearsing Michael W Smiths "Welcome to Our World" last night with the youth choir. I got all misty eyed, thinking of my baby girl. I think it might be a rather emotional Christmas....they always are when I am expecting and this time is no different! Bring on the kleenx.

Well, if you are still reading...hats off to you...this was a lot of random babble...but it's what's running through my mind. Have a great rest of your weeks...leave me a note, I would love to know who is reading along...and if you are the praying type, please say a little prayer for baby girl and her and in Ethiopia!

Monday, November 19, 2007

Number 57

We are 57...actually, I am almost 36 ( a few short hours of 35 left) but we are 57!! We have moved out of the 60's and are now 57 on the unofficial list for a referral! There were a bunch more referrals again today. It is so exciting to think about these new families being joined together! In reality, we are still a long way from our call, but it is getting closer! It is pretty awesome to think that last year at this time I was just dreaming of this process, wishing we could start, hoping we would take this journey....and now here we are. So exciting!

So anyway...57 when I turn 36! Gotta like those numbers!

Sunday, November 18, 2007

National Adoption Month

November is National Adoption Month. Needless to say, this year it has taken on a whole new meaning. I am finding that I am surrounded by people who have been touched by adoption. I love it when God just plops someone in your everyday world who is either traveling the path with you or has been on a similar journey. It is great fun! One such friend I have never met in person, but we have become "e-mail" sisters...sharing the ups and downs together. She just got her referral! What a happy day that was. Needless to say I was just a tidge jealous...but so excited for her, her family , and the new little person joining them. That is what this journey is all about. Bringing families together. I know it will be a while until our referral comes, but I completely trust God's timing, and am thankful to even be able to travel this road.

We have one more check to send in to the adoption agency. Still needing to get creative to get that final threshold crossed....I have a hard time "fund-raising" for this. It seems like it is a choice we have made and we need to figure out how we are going to finance it...yet on the flip side, at lot of the money we pay goes to help the kids still without families; needing medical care etc in the orphanage. It's something I am praying on...hoping for an answer soon :)!

As we gather with family this week to celebrate the Thanksgiving heart overflows with Thanksgiving. Thankful that we can offer our homes and our hearts to this child, thankful that our friends and families support us in this venture, and thankful that God is always at the helm, and that this journey called life is never dull!

Monday, November 12, 2007

Things are moving again

Yeah! There were a few referrals finally last week. The agency has initiated a new hotline for the Ethiopia program. They are still planning on a 5-7 month wait for those who are already that means it shouldn't extend, at least not too much. That is a relief. It is so weird not knowing when this will take place. It is hard to think about making plans for the upcoming months and realizing they will need to be rather tentative as "the call" will change everything!

I have been deep in thought about the whole adoption process of late. Not just our adoption, but adoption in general. I have been reading a lot about the Ethics of adoption, and whether it is a good thing or not. It's very easy to sit back and just relish the idea of finally having a daughter, thinking about me, our family, how great it is for us. Then the flip side looks at the family that this child will leave behind. I cannot imagine having a child in this world that I didn't get to see, hold, and love. I cannot fathom that pain. Then there is the issue of being a white family raising a black child. Again, I can lull myself into a happy, dreamy little place, where everything is perfect...but the reality is, this road is going to be bumpy. I think I am ready for the challenge, but I also think I don't have the capacity to understand the depths of the bumps on this road yet. So my heart is torn. I instinctively feel this is right...right for us, right for her, and that in many circumstances, adoption is very right. But I think you have to dig deep, you have to go to those dark places, both within the system of adoption, and within yourself and make your conclusions. So I am digging...somedays, I just have to lay down the shovel and dream about the little girl that will be my daughter, but I know that in order to build in her the strongest foundation possible, I have to pick that shovel back up and continue to dig, and search and sift. So baby girl, know that this mama is digging, I am ready-ing the soil that will feed the seed of your spirit...armed with all I can give you to make your life full of hope and light, not regret.

Monday, November 5, 2007

2 Months Down

Well, two months of waiting down. How many more to go??? That is the million dollar question at the moment. There have still been no referrals, so the line isn't moving a bit. I am trying very hard to psych myself up for a March referral instead of an end of January referral. It is all so unpredictable and I really don't like having no control. I do know however that at the end of all this waiting, we will have our daughter in our arms and that is what matters the most right now. Actually, this next month is going to fly by. It is crazy times at the store, and the boys have really full schedules in the next few weeks!

Ben and I went to McDonalds for lunch today. I needed some fries!! On the way out, I was thinking about the fact that he will start school full time in the fall. I asked him what I was going to do with out my french fry true Ben fashion he said "Oh'll have Ellia, and she will LOVE fries too!" So a little perspective from Mr. Positive!

Josh is in the children's chorus for the musical ( Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat) at the High school and it opens this week. He is having so much fun and it is bringing back so many great memories for me. I still have quite a bit of Diva left in me...might have to find a way to channel a little of that need to perform. I truly do miss it! I have offered to help assistant direct the next musical in 2 years. We'll see where that goes. I have to remind my self...I will have 4 children !!

Well, here's to another month down...hopefully not too many more to go.

Thursday, November 1, 2007

Tricks and Treats!

It was a great night of trick or treating. We all agreed that next year will be even more fun, when we have a little pumpkin! Thought I would include a few picks of our little men!