I think we will walk...

to Africa. Ticket prices have gone up 40% in the last 4 weeks. What was going to be manageable at $4000 for both of us, is now up to almost $3000 per ticket. OUCH! To add to it, August and September are high tourist season in ET, as well as the celebration of New Years in ET in September. Flights are filling fast, and routes are hard to find. We are hoping we get to travel the last week in August or the first week in September. Of course that is optimistic thinking as the dates for travel keep getting pushed out further out (now estimated to be 8-12 weeks from court decision). When we do get our travel info, we will have 1-3 weeks to get tickets and go.

Right now the whole thing has me crazy. It feels like this is never going to happen...like it is all a dream and I really don't have a daughter on the other side of the world. Every milestone on the journey keeps getting pushed further away. When we started this process I never in a million years figured we would still be at home, with no daughter in our arms. The other thing I am finding difficult is that each week that passes, the older Sunshine gets. If travel really lengthens out to 12 weeks, she will be 15 months old. No longer the baby we were referred, but a full blown toddler, and that brings a whole new slew of attachement issues etc. I am so in love with the picture of this child...but even that has be depressed. I know she doesn't look like that child anymore. She has gained weight, and hopefully a smile has reached her eyes. I need to see her, I need to know she is okay, I need to hold her...

Okay, I will stop the pity party now. This wait is taking it's toll, it is pouring rain and thundering at 9 am and I am missing my child...hopefully sunny skies tomorrow!