Surreal

I have a daughter in Africa. I have a daughter in AFRICA. I have a DAUGHTER in Africa. I HAVE A DAUGHTER IN AFRICA!!! It doesn't matter how many times I say this, no matter what word I emphasize, it is so very surreal! I have princess sweetpea's picture up all over the house. On the fridge, above the sink, above her bed, clipped to my purse, and burned into my brain. Every time I open the fridge, I caress the gentle curve of her cheek. Every time I walk past the picture in the dining room, I kiss her little rosebud lips, and yet it is all so very strange. I am kissing and stroking a piece of paper, hoping the love I feel for her somehow transcends time and space and she can feel it.

Nana and I did a little pink power shopping today. Picture me, standing in a big department store, tears in my eyes as I can finally choose outfits, knowing her face and her size. It was wonderful, and once again strange. Hard to know how her little body will fit into different sizes. Will her little malnourished tummy fit in pants? Does she have big feet? Will she fit in footie jammies? I love this child so much already, and yet have so much to learn about her. I can flip from complete joy to great sadness. Joy that the child I have longed for is so close, and sadness at all she has been through in her life and all she has yet to go through.

Dear sweetpea, I pray God wraps you in a tender embrace, bringing you strength and hope and you feel the love that surrounds you from all the reaches of the earth. Child of my heart, you are loved.

Beautiful Brown Eyed Girl

Oh My Gosh I am totally over the moon in love with this child. She really is perfection. She has eyelashes that go on for miles, and you can see her sweet little soul in her huge brown eyes. She has little angel's wings for lips and is just absolutely beautiful. I have not come down off my high yet. I know the next 12-16 weeks to travel could be a beast of a wait, but truly for me, to have a picture to dream about, and a face to pray for helps so much.

I made the first trip to Target today...I tried very hard to reign myself in. I got a couple of picture frames so I can properly display her referral picture. We can send her a 1 gallon zip lock with a blanket we have slept with, a photo album with our pictures, and we are hoping to send a little tape-recorder with some family songs on it. I found a great little blanket and only one outfit managed to hop into my cart, so that was good. I am anxious to have more time to really scour the isles!

I must get back to work now, but ask that you continue to wrap out little one in your thoughts and prayers. She needs to gain some weight, and know that she is loved.

Thank you one and all for helping us get this far!
Love,
Me

Worth The Wait!!!

We have a daughter! She is perfect! Just when you think you can't take it anymore, God surprises you with incredible joy!!

After my pathetic day of crying and moping around the computer, I finally emailed my specialist at 11:21 to see if she thought there was any hope. She replied at 1:20 and said referrals continued to come in and they were matching them as quickly as possible so there was still a glimmer of hope. It made me feel a tidge better. I was supposed to head to the shop right after picking up the boys, so I went and changed clothes. I decided to paint my toenails to brighten my day a bit...I took off the old polish and had just finished my big toe when the phone in my pocket vibrated. The area code was 651 our agency. I flipped it open and said "Do you have my girl?" Ben informed me that he didn't think I would get anything else done the rest of the day. I asked if he could conference in E as I was pretty sure I couldn't remember his number. So he told me to hang on...longest 2 minutes of my life! Eric got on and then had to have us wait as he had someone take over his class. Another looooooong wait. Then we got the info on our girl. She is 10 months old, but tiny. She is only about 11 lbs and 23 inches long. She def. has some malnourishment going on. She also has an ear infection and a tummy bug. Otherwise she is just perfect. We heard a little of her story and then were told to get her info reviewed and let them know asap if we accepted the referral. E and I agreed to go and get the boys before we opened the email with her picture so we could all see it together. We met at their school. Z was at gym on the playground and came running....'Did we get her??" big hugs...we headed up to J's classroom and the smile on his face when he saw us was huge. We all ran home to open the email with her info and picture. Gathered around the dining room table, we opened up our first look at our daughter. She has the most gorgeous brown eyes and lashes that go on forever. She has a serious little face that I cannot wait to make smile. She is dressed in a pink long sleeved onesie with flowers that is adorable. We cannot post a pic until she is legally ours in a few weeks. Once we pass through court, I will share her perfect-ness!!

Needless to say, I am over the moon. I can't say I have forgotten the wait, but without a doubt, it was worth every second and there is no doubt in my mind that this is my daughter.

Now what? We are waiting for a call from our ped who is looking over her file tonight, then we will accept the referral. We hope to travel in about 12 weeks. (Right about when school starts!) I will post more tomorrow...when I come down from the clouds!

GOD IS GREAT!

Dread (edited and added to)

So it sounds like over 24 referrals went out yesterday in the new batch. I would guess that means that we didn't make that batch which probably means we won't make it through. I woke up positive...not so much now. I dread a day waiting for the phone. YUCK. I think I have to set my sights on a Christmas baby, hard as that is....I think it just might be reality.

Off to a biz meeting, not sure how I will concentrate....when i would like to roll up in a ball and cry!

I'll keep you all posted!

A dear friend got her referral today for a sweet baby girl. I am ecstatic for her and her family. They were behind us on the list. I have it figured one of two ways...the forgot us or skipped us for some unknown reason, or our SW is not in this am and will call later today with my baby girl. I must say I am fully feeling the first option, and the tears are pretty constant. Hard to do much with tears clouding your vision. I am trying sooo hard to let go let God. But I just keep hanging on .

Breathe in, Breathe Out

So Zen in gone I think....there was a note on the forum (chat group of agency families adopting from ET) and someone had just spoken to her rep who said it was crazy busy and they had just gotten another batch of referrals. Let's just say that made my heart stop. We are now the tippy top of the list for a girl. In theory, they should give those out in the next 2 days so we have time to have the medical reviewed and can accept the referral by Friday afternoon. I am soo scared to hope. Please God, let my daughter be in this batch!

Peace

I don't know why, but I am remarkably calm about this whole situation today. It could be that I am fairly certain that no news will come today, as most referrals go out on Thursdays or Fridays. It could be that I had a good weekend, with my family, enjoying the sun, working on a deck, and being away from the computer. It could be that God has given me a little peace for my patience, which feels so good. I have also arrived at the point where I realize she will come. It is out of my control when she will come, but she will come. If I have to wait an excruciatingly long time, finally getting her in my arms will become that much sweeter I guess. And I have peace because I have hope. I really do. I am going to have a daughter....how lucky am I?

So I am hoping this very Zen outlook continues to hover over and through me all the way until Saturday. Then, I will most likely be giddy with joy or pretty crushed with disappointment, but regardless, she is coming sometime before the new year, and when I am finally blessed enough to lay eyes on her sweet face, true joy will be mine.

(Please keep praying...zen like or not ;) )

Do Not Worry

Don't you love it when God just flat out tells you to chill! E and I were the vocalists with the worship band at church today. I love to sing at church and this was definitely the balm I needed. The passage for today was from Matthew 6:24-34 and the last verse "So do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will have worries of it's own. Today's trouble is enough for today." really hit home. So true. Worry is not going to change the outcome of this process.

During the time for prayer requests, we asked for the congregation to keep us in their prayers this week as we wait, impatiently to be matched with our daughter. As my pastor later lifted our request up in prayer, she spoke of the joyful anticipation the whole congregation feels for this little one that we will all welcome. I got very teary...then right after the prayer, E and I sang Eagles Wings. We had rehearsed it many times, but for the first time it really spoke to me about my daughter. There is a line I had to sing about "famine will bring you no fear". That did me in and I finished the verse with the tears glistening in my eyes.
We ended the service with "Step by Step"...step by step you lead me and I will follow you all of my days...

It was just the kick in the pants I needed to remind me that God truly is at the helm of this ship, and God's hand leads and protects us, and God's arms embrace us. I feel much better...more peaceful, ready to meet my daughter!

Not thinking about it...

is truly impossible. Four days is what stands between me getting my daughter in my arms by September, or waiting until possibly December to bring her home. Pretty hard not to have this as a sole focus on my mind. Get a referral and accept it by Friday and we should be good to make it through court before the rains. Get a referral the next week and we wait to get through court in October. Pretty stressful stuff. Also have to be at work today (the owner seems to pull the holiday weekends...how is that?? Remind me to schedule better next year!) and at work, if it is slow, as a holiday weekend typically is, I am left with my thoughts and the computer. Not to mention a baby shop is about the last place I should be!

But I am faithful. I am hopeful. I believe in a God who can do miracles...God sent me on this journey and has directed the path all along. When the seed of adoption was planted in my heart years ago, God watered it, he planted the seed in E's heart and watered it as well. God showed us our daughter is in Ethiopia, and the path hasn't been easy, but it has been filled with little miracles all along. I have faith, I have hope, I almost have peace....it will happen.

Keep praying, we need a little miracle.

"Keep your expectations in check"

This was the advice from my agency rep. There are not any more referrals this week and they don't know if they will get more before the dreaded June 1 cut off or not. If we don't get a referral before then she is pretty sure we won't make it through court. She indicated that there are lots of people at the "top" of the list right now. And while we are among them, we need to expect not to make it. So there is something to make you bawl. I am interpreting the info to mean we don't stand a chance. I hate this roller coaster...I really do. She encouraged me to think about other things this weekend...take my mind off this. Yeah right, and let me single handed-ly end starvation, the war and decrease gas prices too!

I am still holding out hope. I can't go to the other extreme quiet yet. God has a plan.

The View from the Top

Okay, so we are sitting close to the top of the list. We're 2nd in line for a girl (actually, there are 3 of us with the same log in date all waiting for girls...I just put us first!). Granted, this is the unofficial list, but it is so close regardless!! So now todays questions...

Are there more referrals coming?
Will today be our day?
If not today, will we make it through before June 1?
So close and yet so far. I am wearing lucky pink, my African necklace, my girliest perfume, my good luck pearl earrings, and we have consulted Zippy the psychic lizard (J's pet) and he gave the getting a referral today a tongue's up! So we'll see. I am quite giddy!

If you are in the neighborhood, stop in to the shop today...I will be the one with the cell phone attached to my hand, my finger refreshing the forum, and the crazed look in my eye!

Let the games begin!!

Holy Sh**

We are MOVING up the list. We are now 3rd in line for a girl. OMG!!!

"Just keep swimmin, just keep swimmin......"

Waiting for Joy

I have to remind myself, all this waiting and uncertainty is for the most precious gift. Sometime, in the next 7 months, I will hold my daughter. Of course I hope this is on the shorter side of 7 months...but regardless, this is a once in a lifetime wait...and I am truly waiting for joy like I have only know a few times before. I think if the dreaded court closure wasn't hanging over my head, I could really be celebrating the excitement and anticipating the joy. But those darn court closures really feel like a huge cloud hanging over the process. Maybe once we get past that date, if we haven't made it through, I can relax, knowing that the worst case scenario is THE case and just chill.

I indulged in retail therapy this am. Hit Target (my own oasis), got a vat of Diet Coke, picked up some burpcloths, and little toy links. I had to refrain from buying clothes as those cute sundresses aren't going to work well if she comes home in November! But a little pink goes a long way.

There have still been no referrals today...we are now at T-5 days and counting. Ugh.

I am going back to my happy place, with diet coke and maybe spin some James Taylor tunes...and continue to refresh the adoption forum...holding out for good news!

PMS and Waiting...

a recipe for disaster! As I have been moping around the last few days, crying at the drop of a hat (blaming it on my allergies!) I truly thought I was maybe losing my mind. But alas, throw a whopper case of PMS in the mix with some of the most intense days of "waiting" in my life and you're all lucky tears is all I can be blamed for. What a roller-coaster. I am definitely ready to get off this wild ride...but no end seems to be in sight. There have been no referrals yet today...history indicates that referrals usu come in on Wed, Thurs, and Fridays, so where are they already?

I am trying really hard to stay focused on life at hand...knowing God has a plan here...but God certainly knows that I prefer to be privy to the plan well in advance...so this is sooo hard. I am trying I really am...but I am about to scream UNCLE!!

Keep those prayers a comin!

Stuck

I wasn't really sure what to blog about today. I am feeling very stuck..stuck in the waiting for the phone to ring hole. I don't like it, but can't seem to get out of it. As my mom reminded me, I am just about where I am at the end of a pregnancy...raging hormones and all. Yieks.

There is such sad news out of Ethiopia right now. You can click here to read for yourself http://www.cnn.com/2008/WORLD/africa/05/20/ethiopia.children/index.html.

It is so hard to have such passion for this country and be able to do so little. I am a person who likes to take action, make a difference, make a change. If I could hop a plane, load it with food , I would go. These children are my children...they are all of our children...what are we going to do to help them?

Monday, Monday

So it's Monday! After a wonderful weekend in the gardens, where I discovered muscles I didn't realize I had, I now find myself back at Monday...with my cell phone glued to my person. I kind of feel like I am living in some kind of surreal bubble. There is a whole world going about it's business around me, and I am suspended in time, waiting for the phone to ring. The day to day, like cleaning bathrooms, folding laundry, just piles up as I truly feel incapable of accomplishing anything! I know if I could keep myself occupied, the week would zoom by. You know those recurring dreams you get sometimes, where you are in school and you are late for a test and you can't find the classroom or you didn't even know you were taking that class...I sort of have that feeling. I can forget for a moment what it is I am waiting for, go about my life, tending to the mundane, but there is always that feeling lurking just below the surface, that dread mixed with joy, mixed with anticipation, mixed with fear. I am getting to the point where it just seems like it will NEVER happen. Like I will be waiting for this precious face forever. Come on phone, ring, jolt me back into reality!

2 Weeks!

Okay, so this could be the week. I vascilate between total excitement to complete ulcer inducing tension as I realize we are down to 2 weeks. 2 WEEKS! I could know who my daughter is in 2 weeks. I could throw up, I could dance, I should probably be committed. I have a constant conversation going on with God right now...only God seems rather quiet...I have a ton to do this week, and I am guessing I might not be too focused. I really want to just go away for a week and not think about it all. UGH!

I feel a little guilty continuing to ask for prayers...but keep um coming. Insanity is but a breath away!

THANK YOU

Several of you read my pity party yesterday and made a point to make me feel better. You know who you are, and I really couldn't survive this journey without you! This whole process has brought some amazing women into my life and I am proud to call you friends!

We are off to Preschool Graduation and a picnic...I will post some pics to the graduate later!

Thanks again for making me smile...(now just make my phone ring with THE call!)

The Waiting Blues

Wow...do I have a case of these today! I had been doing pretty good until I did a little math this am. (Yeah...I know, the results might be questionable, math was never my best subject). We are between 8 and 12 on the unofficial list. That would make us most likely between 16 and 22 on the real list. There are only 2 weeks left until the June 1st cut off. There are fabulous rumors running wild about huge batches of referrals coming and the Care Center taking in lots of kids to get them to their forever families before the courts close. But will there be enough? We also are in the middle of a large clump of families that are requesting baby girls. How many baby girls will come into care? Is my daughter in the mix? I am pretty sure there won't be referrals this week as it seems there is often some down time between batches. SO I have pinned my hopes on next week, but I don't want to be too hopeful.

I think the week as a single parent is also taking it's toll. I am ready to share the tasks again...could use a hubby hug, someone else to poop scoop, take out the trash and help move the huge rocks in the garden I am dreaming up. The kids have been great, it's all the other stuff that flows into a day that I need him back for.

B "graduates " from preschool tomorrow. I am not sure in my tender emotional state I will handle that very well. My baby, done with preschool (or as he calls it "Pretty School" ) I can't believe I have to send him off to the big school next year. Yieks. Tears will be a flowin.

So on the upside, we finally seem to have found spring. It is going to be a really nice weekend, so I am planning hard physical labor, lots of flower planting, and a good sunburn to take my mind off things. That and a few glasses of wine and I should make it.

Please keep praying for us, our daughter, and patience. I am trying very hard to trust that God has this all worked out, and it will be more than I ever dreamed...but some days, it's a stretch!

All Hail Ikea!

So after being soo concerned about how the boys were going to do sharing a room, Z came to me (he didn't know I had been fretting about this) and said, "As soon as we get our referral, B and I better move in together. It will give us all summer to figure out how to share." Dang, that kid is a bright one! So we set about with tape measure, scratch paper and wishes in hand and laid out what I think will be a great room! And Ikea is coming to the rescue!!

Zach will get this bed, which will replace the oversized loft he has now.


Then to divide the room and give them both lots of storage for their many treasures...we'll have two of these: and I will put fun fabric in-between to make a "wall". In theory, it should be perfect! Now to just get rid of all the clutter! Good thing there is a whopper of a garage sale in our near future!

It is warm and sunny out today. I am hoping this sunshine is a sign of great things to come! Have a great day one and all!

A New Week...

and hope abounds. E is out of town for the week. We are having mom and kid time (aka DQ for dinner) these weeks when he is gone are hard and easy all at the same time. Easy because sort of anything goes....but hard because I am not cut out to be a single parent! We will all be happy to see dad when he gets home on Saturday.

The referral rumors are flying all over...lots of babies in the care center...more referrals coming...nothing concrete, but rumors that make your heart beat a little faster! I do feel we are so close. There are a about 5 of us who all have the dossier date of 9/5 and we are all requesting baby girls. It will be interesting to see how that plays out. I continue to be optimistic that we will make it thru!

The dilemma I am facing right now has to do with the 2 that will be sharing a room once baby is home. She is set up to be in our room for now...however, she will eventually get the little bedroom that B is in and B and Z will share a room. I would love to know what any of you BTDT mom's recommend. I am thinking about putting the boys together sooner than later...be able to make a big deal of transforming their room, getting the new beds etc. Summer tends to be a little easier for projects. I worry that with transition to school, new sister, etc, changing rooms later might be harder. That said, the flip side is they could have their own room for longer if we waited. But knowing they will eventually share...does it make sense to put off the inevitable....I don't know how long little one will be in our room...not sure what will seem right for her. But we know eventually she will have her own space. So let me know what you think...I am looking for guidance!!

I am off to read a magazine in the sunshine for a bit...happy Monday and keep those prayers coming!

Happy Mother's Day!!

I am sure I won't make it into blog land tomorrow as it is shaping up to be a very full day. However, I wanted to wish the mommies out there a very happy Mother's Day. Whether you have birthed your children, adopted your children or come to mothering through some other way, you are a mom through and through. It is the worlds hardest and most amazing job. I wouldn't trade it for the world. So for all of you out there who answer to the name mom...I raise my glass to you this weekend!

We celebrated a short and sweet Mother's Day this am at my house. E leaves in the am and we have company tonight, so it seemed breakfast was it. As was so eloquently said to me..."we interrupt this regularly scheduled Saturday to bring you Mother's day." I got to eat a yummy butter braid and have my coffee cup frequently re-filled. Z made me a sweet bookmark, B had a cute and funny preschool project, J got me earrings that have an African look about them and Dad got me this
I Love it...you can find it at http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=11410437.
I am wearing it with pride today...along with my earrings. My heart truly is in Africa right now.

After our short programming preemption, it was back the regularly scheduled program of scrubbing toilets and folding laundry...ah yes, a mama's work is never done. But at least I know I am loved!

On the referral front, there was one more reported referral Friday pm. Someone had heard from a friend who was recently at the care center that there were at least 50 babies in care...so this Mother's Day, I pray for all those babies who have lost the mother that gave them life and are waiting for the mama who will nurture them through life; prayers for the mommies who's arms ache to hold their children, and praises to God for bring families together.

Happy Mother's Day

Friday, Friday...

and no more referrals as of yet. However, the word on the street is that they are expecting more referrals soon...and 15 have gone out so far...so that is good news. I was holding out for the ultimate Mother's Day present...but looks like I will have to wait a bit longer. According to Murphy's Law...we'll get the referral next week when E is out of town. Go figure! Hey, as long as we get it, I won't complain!

We are headed into a busy weekend. The kids are in a musical at church. J has the lead and Z has a solo. They are becoming quite the thespians! I work tomorrow and E's side of the fam is coming down for the performances, a belated B birthday, and dinner. Then 2 performances on Sunday and my parents down to celebrate Mother's Day. E leaves in between the two performances. Craziness. So this might be the last post until Monday!

So today wasn't our day...

but things are moving. There were 4 referrals on the forum today. 3 for baby girls. We are into the top 10 on the list now, (if I manipulate the numbers a tidge!) I am holding out hope that my baby girl is coming soon. Maybe "The sun will come out tomorrow!"

Keep on prayin!

Bring on the Valium!

Oh My Goodness I am a mess today!!!! I have this pit of my stomach sense of foreboding this am and I can't tell if it is excited foreboding or freaked out foreboding!! There was a referral yesterday and a hint at another one. I have a feeling the dry spell is over. Once again, logic would tell me to chill, we are still a few too far down the list for our referral...but if my daughter is in this batch...I will know soon. My cell phone is glued to my person (gave the kids whiplash as I realized at the end of the block this am that I had left it on the charger!) E called it this am and I nearly drove off the road. It could be a very long day...and if it is dread I am sensing...could be a long weekend! E leaves for a week on Sun and it would be so nice to be in the same place (or at least state!) when this call comes.

So this could all be for naught...but I am a mess none the less...so prayers for a calm heart, and my phone to ring with that all important call!!

Wednesday, Wednesday...

It's Wednesday...hump day, middle of the week day...wishin it was referral day! The general consensus from families on the CHSFS forum is that most referrals come toward the end of the week. So that means tomorrow gets down right close to the end of the week. Hmmm...

So I keep thinking about the "vision" I had of my daughter and Tesi getting her feeling about her. If that really was her...her paperwork should be just about ready to be sent to be matched. This is what keeps giving me pause. Logically, we are still weeks away from a referral if you look at the numbers...and if there are no referrals in the next few days, statistically, we don't make it through before June 1st. But I just have to believe my little one is ready....I am keeping the faith!

Keep praying...(oh and careful calling my cell phone...any time it rings, I am sent into spasms until I see which area code the number is from!)

The Amazing Thing

is that there is a little girl on the other side of the world whom I will be privileged enough to call "daughter". This is such an awesome thought. I don't know her face yet, but she thrives in my heart and her spirit soars in my dreams.

I thank you all for your prayers. I can truly feel them surrounding me and I think they are a large part of why I am feeling a peace about this wait right now. Keep um coming...the wait isn't over!

Not much else today...my heart and my mind are quiet...possibly preparing the soil for an unimaginable love to bloom!

8 Months...pictures, and prayers~

Okay...I know you are waiting for floor pics...here they are! It came out pretty good. Although whomever had the house previously, obviously thought the carpet was there to stay and when they painted, didn't put down any drop cloths...so needless to say we will have to sand and re stain, but it is such a huge improvement and makes me love the house so much more!!

For some reason, this was the only pic that loaded...I will try to get more later! Anyway...they look much better! Saturday was the elementary regional science fair...J had a project and took first in his division! Here is a very mama and son!

Not sure why we are sideways... I will try and fix that!!

On to other news...we got word on Friday that they are going to cut off referrals June 1. We can be open to accepting a referral during the court closure time, (which we will) but unless you get a referral before the 1st, they don't think the case will process through before the courts close. So this leaves us with a sticky wicket...We are RIGHT on the cusp of hitting June 1st. It all depends on how many referrals there are this month. If we don't make it, but get a referral shortly after the 1st, which is pretty likely, then they will still submitt us to court, but with the chance we won't make it though. That will then leave us "in line" to get a court date as soon as the courts re-open in September. Best case scenario, we get a referral before June 1 or shortly there after and make it thorugh court and travel to get our girl in late august. Worse case scenario...we don't get a referral until late June, don't make it through court and then get placed in line and have to wait until Nov or December to go get her. We would have her picture, but would wait extra time to travel.

So I am asking for prayers...prayers we get our referral before June 1st. Prayers that we can be united with our child soon, and none of us will have to wait extra time to become a family. Prayers for all the families waiting on the cusp of the cutoff to have peace in the situation, and hope for the best.

In church on Sunday, I really did get a peace about it all...God sort of told me to chill out, she will be here soon...but none the less...prayers would be much appreciated! God is smiling on me today and gave us a gloriously sunny day off...so I am off to enjoy it. Thanks for keeping us in your prayers!

Home Wrecker

Okay...so I already got my hair chopped off...that brought no luck. SO it is on to bigger and better things. My poor spouse. He survived three pregnancies with me, but this "pregnancy" might just send him over the edge. To say I am restless is a huge understatement. I need to be busy, I need to accomplish some big task...I need to feel I am doing something instead of all this sitting and waiting. The grand state of Minnesota is not helping in this endeavor. Normally, I could be putting all this pent up energy into the yard...clearing the gardens, tidy-ing the play areas, attacking the garage...but alas there is sn*#!! in the forecast yet again and it has just been too damn cold and yucky to get the yard prepped. So that leaves me with the house. I already re-did the bathroom and installing the new patio door might just be a little too much for me to tackle. So tonight I am going on an archaeological dig...and unearthing the wood floors in the living room. We have a huge living room...really too big I think, and it is carpeted in white...yes WHITE carpet. I have 3 boys, 2 dogs, and a cat...think that carpet is still white? No way sister! I am sick of looking at dirty carpet...so it is coming out. The thought of my sweet precious little girl crawling on that carpet is enough to make me rather nauseous...so out it is coming. Back to my poor spouse...he's had a long week...he is tired...and getting a cold, so the kids and I are going to do this job (well, most of it!) Said spouse also reminded me that we have a house full of company coming tomorrow..I said...won't they love the new look of the floors!

So keep your fingers crossed...that hubby doesn't pack up and leave me...that the wood I am 98% sure is under that carpet really is there and intact...and that I can have it all spit-shined and pretty by tomorrow's company! I'll post pics as soon as it's done!!

Sweetness

So this morning I am signing off J's academic planner. They keep a daily "to do" list and then as parents, we make sure they have done everything and sign it off. It is a great way to keep tabs on what is going on in the classroom. Anyway, this morning, in our rush to get out the door, he tossed it to me with a pen and the "quick mom, sign it" look in his eyes. Because it is a new month, it was opened to the calendar for the month. Scrawled in ten year old penmanship was 'Referral ANY DAY !!!!!!!" written across most of the month. Attempting to keep my ever present tears at bay...I told him I thought that was really cool that he was thinking about his sister. "Mom" he says " I am always thinking about her, this wait is making me crazy" Oh so hard to keep the water works at bay at that point!! We had a great hug, and agreed the wait is really driving us crazy...but won't it be great when she is home.

Sitting in my dining room today is the ultimate car seat. Nana and Papa got us the Britax Marathon in pink. It totally rocks...now we just need to get this girl home and into it! Thanks mom and dad!
The comment from Z was ... now that's pink! Love it.

Going to try to be happy today. Going to try and focus on happy energy, happy thoughts and pink carseats. No tears today...she will come when the timing is perfect.